**The exclusive interview with famed fisherman Ryan Townsend has been postponed until further notice. He is on spring break.

This past week was rather doomed. Most of the doom can be attributed to war, obsessive war coverage, and my office being moved to a place that reminds me of war. So basically I have been distracted, making it difficult to think about hobbies, nail color, or red carpet. I would like to think that if I were on my usual 150% perk, I would suggest things like substituting the word "war" with "tape dispenser" or something like that. Anyway - instead of rambling on about a subject matter we are coming to know all too well, I would like to talk about something that surprisingly has taken my mind off of war, and will hopefully serve as some kind of distraction. Two nights ago, I received a phone call from a friend living on the West Coast, experiencing their first trip on ecstacy. The only association this phone call has with war, is the fact that when he called me at 5:45am, I was laying in my bed, wide-awake, wondering where the pigeons sleep, and thinking about war.
Actually, F that. Every time I try to type out his drug speak, it gives no justice to our conversation. Why don’t we all just try to focus on Hollywood. Here is a movie review of Lord of the Rings the Two Towers (known by true fans as L.O.T.R., triple T)- posted by none other than... MY FATHER.