Wednesday

How cool is this guy?? I mean seriously. I wish I could adopt him or something.

Tuesday

I would like to propose that Ben Harper is the Bob Marley of our generation.
Oh boy. I just found a site that outlines all of the thrift stores in my neighborhood. This will keep me busy.

Items that I am looking for at thrift shops:
1. typewriter
2. leather boots - high heeled, round toed, black or brown.
3. new rain jacket
4. dress shoes
5. couch
6. coffee table
7. rocking chair
8. shelves
9. coat hooks
10. vintage stoneware or milkglass.

Monday

I actually started giggling with excitement during the opening shots/credits of The Ladykillers. I felt like the pimply nerd with greasy hair named John Schroeder at a Star Wars premiere. Unfortunately the movie didn’t keep that level of enthusiasm – but the opening credits were enough to spark.
They were the kinds of shots that take about an hour to set up - yet they are so simple. More than point and shoot – still life images of a trash heap, a station, and house – simple and pristine. But dare I say mundane? The work of the Coen Brothers speaks for itself; however in my mentioning these shots I hope you too will notice the quality and effort that had to go into making them KICK ASS.
I attempted to recreate a couple still life images of the world that are still, and dead, but serve a life purpose. They didn’t really turn out the way the Coen Bro’s did (shocker) but I have to start somewhere.

This picture is similar to the colors used - but nothing like the Coen Bro's opening shots. It is a shot from my Sunday morning "End of the Line" trip on the B train to Coney Island.
One highlight of my trip to Coney Island, was spending a coupon on my first Nathan's hot dog. The other highlight was meeting a hooker named Aurora on the B44 bus to Billyburg. She hopped on the bus, and announced:
I am taking this bus to the last stop. It's a hell of a long ride. (Sits in front of me. )
I am taking this bus to the last stop too.
Why?
I just feel like it. Why get off?
Oh.
We chatted about our names. I said that her name matched her personality. She said my name was pretty.
She narrated the ride. Her and her bleached hair with black roots. She was growing long hair to be Lady Godiva in the Mermaid Parade.
She took me to a thrift store in Williamsburg.
The Hassids were baking, and the air smelled like sweet bread.
We were appropriately deposited under the tracks.
I tried things on. But didn't find anything to write home about -
like Aurora said I would.

Pause.

Left the clothes for someone else to put back.
Said goodbye and stepped outside.
Looked up at the train tracks.
Then went home.

Thursday

I read all about this yesterday – but didn’t really believe it. I thought it would go away. But then this morning I was laying there willing myself to get up, listening to the usual morning radio. Bob Edwards was absent. Renee Montagne kept saying “Bob Edwards is out today – but I am Renee Montagne”. I raised my fist to the ceiling – “Those bastards! I want Bob!”
I have already sent Bob an email telling him that I want him to stay.
A bunch of other people are pretty pissed about it too. I agree with the kids at metafilter – I will write a letter to NPR or sign whatever I need to sign.
NPR is making it look like he wants to leave. Bob loves Morning Edition. Its his thing. They are taking it away from him. Fooey.


The father of NPR has been given the boot.

Tuesday

Giant is the Godfather of 1956. Or maybe I could say it in more obvious terms - Giant is to Cowboys as Godfather is to Italians. Or, the Godfather trilogy is the Giant of our generation.

Monday

End of the Red Line. New Lots, Brooklyn.



Friday

Slutty Susan email to her writing tutor:

Winston –

Hey you cunning linguist - should we meet at the Library at say, 5?

-Susan.

Wednesday

In preparation for spring, I am am shopping for the perfect jean jacket. J.Crew will embroider your initials for free – the only stipulation being that it has be three letters.
Fully disenchanted with my initials ALG – I started looking up three letter words. I like GEM, FOX, & MAX. But decided on MOA. Apparently a MOA is an extinct flightless bird.
I think it would be a nice conversation starter.
Hot Guy in C.P. on lunch break from his curatorial job at the Natural History Museum: “hey cute thing – I noticed MOA on your jacket? Did you know that a Moa is an extinct flightless bird?”



To be continued.......
You know you should be a 3rd grade teacher when...
You realize that you are the person who is SHOCKED and borderline OFFENDED when people don't wear green on St. Patrick’s Day. I mean, it is the one day we can celebrate wearing GREEN.

I guess there is a bright side: now there is a good excuse to be able to pinch every boring guy's ass in the office. That could prove highly enjoyable.
Here is a poem sent to me by my little friend Miles. He is 9 years old. He lives in Rye, New York. He studies the Recorder, Piano, and can kick my ass at Gamecube. When Miles visits me in the city, we enjoy watching movies, expensive Diners, and Jaywalking. When I visit Miles in the country we enjoy canoeing Long Island Sound, riding the DragonCoaster at Playland, and biking down to the "secret beach". So, without further delay:

OLD
I am old and ugly
Sad and blue
I am probably 5,000 years older than you
I have gray hair
Crooked teeth
And all my freckles faded away
My nose is to big my eyes are to small
My legs are bad
I should probably crawl
I am as thin as a bone
I am a portrait of a man all alone
- miles h. III
I love this song. If you own Ladies of the Canyon - you know that this should be played extremely LOUD.

Conversation by Joni Mitchell.

He comes for conversation
I comfort him sometimes
Comfort and consultation
He knows that’s what he’ll find
I bring him grapes and cheeses
He brings me songs to play
He sees me when he pleases
I see him in cafes
And I only say, hello
And turn away before his lady knows
How much I want to see him
She removes him, like a ring
To wash her hands
She only brings him out to show her friends
I want to free him

Secrets and sharing soda
That’s how our time began
Love is a story told to a friend
It’s second hand
But I’ll listen to his questions
I’ll give my answers when they’re found
He says she keeps him guessing
But I know she keeps him down
She speaks in sorry sentences
Miraculous repentances
I don’t believe her
Tomorrow he will come to me
And he’ll speak his sorrow endlessly and he’ll ask me why
Why can’t I leave her?

He comes for conversation
I comfort him sometimes
Comfort and consultation
He knows that’s what he’ll find

Tuesday

I have new neighbors. Yeah. Whatever. They are okay. Two girls right out of high school, Oh, I mean college. I wanted the dream - a quiet writer boy with a dog - living there. But no. This is 83rd st. I got two spoiled brats.
So on Saturday, I was debating going over there with a banana cream pie, and welcoming them to the building.
"Hi! Welcome to the building!"
"thanks."
"So! Did that broker clean up before you moved in?? Sure was a rascal! I tell yah - why, I saw a porn session happen in that very room right there! Wowie how you have really done something with the place! Well if you ever need anything - just let me know - I am down the hall. Enjoy the banana cream!!"
So I finally get my beautiful boner bonus this paycheck. Yes. I will be buying my digital camera. I was thinking about splurging on the waterproofing case, so I can go underwater and take your beautiful picture.

Friday

Today is my blog's birthday. Happy Birthday Blog. This site has had many names - so today I am officially naming the damn thing. ANYC BLOG. Get it? I live in NYC, and my name is Anise. Its a spin on the mispronunciation of NYC.
enjoy.

Thursday

McDonalds is sponsoring the Olympics.

Okay that alone to me, is a joke.

Lets do some numbers.

The average Olympic marathon runner will burn 1000 calories during the run.

A Quarter Pounder with cheese is 770 calories.

Oh yeah – and 47 grams of fat.

The average Olympic marathon runner is around 3.3% fat.

So who exactly will McDonalds be feeding this summer in Athens?
I often feel sad for those horses clomping up and down the avenues and throughout Central Park. In doing some research about getting a pet - I went to the ASPCA website and found this article in hopes to try to save the NYC horses.
I was on the ASPCA website, because last night I went to this focus group for potential pet owners. After they milked us for information, we were sent on our merry way with 50 bucks, and an adoption fee waiver for any pets from the ASPCA (good for 30 days).
I was in a room full of moms and other single girls. When asked the question: "What issues are swaying you away from getting a cat?", I was the only one in the room to answer:
"well two guy friends are basically telling me that I shouldn't become "that girl". You know, the girl with the cat. They want me to get a dog, because dogs make girls more attractive."
So that got a laugh. But its totally true. If I get a cat, in my current state of being single; I might as well start volunteering at the library.
So my thoughts have turned towards getting a dog.
Any suggestions on what kind of dog I should get - please email me within the next 30 days. I would like a dog that doesn't shit. I would also like a dog that doesn't do anything while I am away from the apartment. Oh, and if you know of any dogs that won't bark - that would be great too. Thanks.
I didn't know that Howard Stern was in trouble. This morning, NPR was all fuzzy. So I was flipping channels. Low and behold - KROCK & Howard Stern ranting and raving about Michael Powell from the FCC. He was saying that Michael Powell's website is the equivalence of a 16 year olds blog. Stern grew so furious about "Powell stomping out freedom of speech" that he had to go off the air, and turn the dear listener to commercials. I am not the typical Stern sympathizer. Not in the least. But this plea for freedom of speech, stirred up a change of heart.
So I caught a few clips of the New Paltz mayor marrying gay couples this past week. I couldn’t help but smile! That mayor a.) is my age! And b.) looked so thrilled! I couldn't help but start beaming and laughing (while running on treadmill, practically spitting on the girl next to me.) Either way, it was so refreshing to see. Instead of linking you to all the hoopla about his being charged- here is an article about how he unseated the former New Paltz mayor of 16 years....
For real, who's buying tickets to this tour?? Young girls?? All the gay men are now turning into wholesome couples - so who's left?? 40 year old Madonna whores?? Try to fit a demographic to this description of Britney's current tour:

SAN DIEGO, March 3 — Britney Spears's white terry-cloth robe dropped to the floor, revealing a sequin-covered body stocking. She stepped into a bathtub that, like her bodysuit, was see-through. In shadow to her left, like silhouettes seen through hotel room windows, men and women in beds mimed passionate sex with one another.
Beneath them a man wearing only tight white briefs splayed his legs and gyrated on a bed. After her mock bath Ms. Spears, wearing a pink bra and panties, rolled around in bed with him as two male dancers to their left took off each other's pants and danced suggestively together.
So went just a few minutes of the Onyx Hotel Tour, Ms. Spears's first roadshow in nearly two years, which opened on Tuesday night at the San Diego Sports Arena. And for a woman who has said that she's sick of being in the headlines, it's certainly designed to grab more. With a suggestive, racy show that contains very little actual singing, she seems to have outdone even her mentor, Madonna.

Wednesday

Apparently Slutty Susan was at a record label party last night:

Bobby -

I had to cut out early last night. Didn't have a chance to say goodbyes. Any chance on getting your 7-inch later in the week?

Susan.

Tuesday

ESPN was on the TV that was in front of my treadmill. I have never watched - wait, I take that back. When I was a kid, I liked to watch bowling on Saturdays with my dad. And I also like watching the random swim meets and the Tour de France. So anyway. The UTAH vs. BYU game was on. I was paying attention because when I lived in Idaho this would have been grounds for all the guys to cut class.
However, I couldn't concentrate on the game. Not out of naivete for basketball. It was out of my shock at the amount of TITS on that channel. Every woman commentator had HUGE tits. I thought ESPN was sports. Shouldn't they have butch dyke Martina Navratilova-esque girls on there with their low voices talking like men? What about Summer Sander? What happened to her? She didn't have big TITS she was someone for the whole family.
I actually thought it was a joke when the weather girl got up and told me about the cold front blowing up her skirt.
I am hoping that they at least let these ESPN girls take mini vacations during the ESPN coverage of the national spelling bee. Save the children!